Dropping Bad Habits: Living by Comparison

Making the decision to actively pursue life is one that brings to light a lot of bad habits I have picked up in the short time I have been alive. One majorly bad habit (or activity, or way of thinking, or however you'd like to put it) is the tendency to compare my life to those around me.

Common thoughts that occur:

• "Oh look at [person my age], they already know what they are doing with their life. They have a career, a great place to live, and an awesome social life. What's wrong with me, in that I don't have any of those things figured out?" 
• "Holy crap, those lists of top actors/CEOs/entrepreneurs under 25 is really depressing. Why haven’t I accomplished anything close to that yet?”
• “Oh look at [successful 40-something person]; they started their career by my age. Why haven’t I started on my own amazing career path… will I ever knowsuccess?”
• “I am alone in my career concerns. Everyone around me has their sh*t together, and I am messily stumbling through adulthood.”

In conversation with the wise adults and perceptive peers that fill my life, I have found that I am not the first (nor last) person to have thoughts like these. I am not alone in any of my confusion. I am not alone in this tendency to compare myself to others.

 

This pattern of thought can be quite damaging to anyone. In comparing myself to others, I am just setting myself up for disappointment and frustration within my own situation. Measuring my own success through the way others have made their path in life belittles me and all the great things I have accomplished in recent years.

 

So this is a new commitment: when I am tempted to compare my personal or professional life to another person, the only thing I will look at is the lessons they have learned that I may be able to apply to my own life-voyage.

 

Of course I will falter. There will always be that internal inclination to look outward to figure out where I should be in life. It is hard to avoid. But I will try. I don’t want anyone else to tell me how to live, not even my demanding inner-self. Right now I am exactly where I need to be – I’m ready and rarin’ to grow.